I know I’m not the only woman who does this

Two weekends from now is the chorus’ Oscar Party. With such an event, of course I’m thinking about what all I am going to wear.


Normally I wouldn’t be this frou-frou or girly about something of this nature. I much more the type to try on twelve outfits fifteen minutes before I’m due to leave, choose whatever is hanging the best on my frame, and head out the door while smearing eyeliner under my lashes and hoping I had cab fare.


However, because clothes are suddenly fitting much differently than they previously did, I needed to do some prep work in case this required going to a store for something that fit. I opened my closet up, accessed its rarely-accessed fancy-ish section, and started by trying everything on.


I don’t know about the rest of the women out there, but I sure do have a lot of dresses that I’ve never worn. When given the chance, I’ll take full advantage of that. However, it’s not like I attend a lot of events that call for a dress.


Friends aren’t getting married anytime soon. Charity events are usually low-key. Work parties, even if we had them, would not be graced with my presence. And add to it that it’s balls cold for nine months of the year, and that’s that.


But despite that, when I find something of interest while browsing thrift shops, I do go ahead and shell out the $10 just in case I find myself somewhere needing something a little more dressy than my usual Ann Taylor Loft.


Last October I grabbed two dresses: a classy CK black dress with spaghetti straps and just enough sparkle to catch one’s eye, and a silver strapless mini dress that hugs all the curves. I wasn’t quite comfortable in the second dress, but my sister — a woman who has no issue with telling me when my ass looks fat — told me I was being an idiot and should get it. A lady waiting her turn for the dressing room echoed her thoughts. I questioned her intent (she’d get my fitting room if I got out of there) and her style (white trash-tastic cotton stretch pants and flip-flops don’t exactly scream high fashion), but I coughed up $6 and got it anyway.


There’s also a pale purple dress. A blue dress. A black one I wore to NYE with Josh and Catie. A black one I wore to an ex’s company holiday party. A pink one I was going to wear to a wedding and then ended up no longer seeing the guy who invited me. On and on and on.


One by one, I tried everything on. I’m too pale. My boobs are too big. (Yeah, I know. Shocker.) My butt looks a little too Kardashian. Too plain. Too cutesy. Too casual. On and on and on.


I’m truly down to the black dress I bought in October, only now it’s slightly too big. Weight loss is good and all, but I need to still be able to wear my clothes, dammit. It’s looking like I’ll be able to make a couple alterations and have the dress work. If nothing else, it’ll get worn once and can be passed along. That’s worth the $10 I paid for it, right?

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One response to “I know I’m not the only woman who does this

  1. Wouldn’t it be nice if there was a shop where you could rent a dress for $10 and then not have it cluttering up your closet. You’d be able to go out and get something new all the time and not worry about if you’d ever use it. Plus it would be one less thing to pack or donate when it came time to move.

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